490 Reasons To Say Goodbye.

Today I am grateful for 490 Reasons.

This blog started on January 31, 2012.

and today is January 31, 2013.

it's been a whole year.

of being grateful.

and that's all she wrote, folks.

that was the goal. a year of blogging. 365 days (366 if you remember that last year was leap year) of remaining positive and seeing the good even with the bad.

Now, this will only technically be my 298th post, not my 365th. when I planned to try and blog every night i didn't take into consideration the nights that i would be drinking, or on vacation, or drinking, or have serious writers block, or drinking...so even though it's been a whole year, i haven't posted 365 reasons to be grateful yet...or so i thought.

but i have a tendency to be grateful for several things in one post.

so i took an hour, grabbed a pen and a notebook and went back through all of my previous posts and made a tally mark for everything i was grateful for in each post. then counted the tallies.

490.

490 things that i was grateful for last year.

Do you even remember how last year started?

it was awful. that was the whole reason behind the blog project. and in the last 365 days i've managed to be grateful for 490 things. amazing.

and what a year it was, wasn't it? almost everything i was worried about on that night in January is not currently an issue.

My father-in-law is still in remission (kicking cancer's ass like a BOSS), my sister's biopsy came back benign, my brother's problems have been sorted out for the most part. everything that happened last January could have totally ruined the year 2012. things could have gone one way, a very bad way, and yet they didn't. they all seemed to sort them self out, or in the medical cases, be treated the best they possibly could and then had a little bit of miraculous help from whatever higher power you believe in. now that, is truly something to be grateful for.

i considered keeping on with the blog, writing until i had at least 365 posts. but the truth is, as much as this blog has helped me, i think it's offered about as much help as it is ever going to. I needed an outlet a year ago. something to keep me focused and on track with staying positive. it has completely transformed my way of thinking, i look for the reason to be grateful now. in happy moments, and sad moments. i see it now, when i need to enjoy life a little bit more and realize how truly blessed i am. and while i'm so happy that this project has taught me this, it's also been a little bit of a nuisance. as much as i loved this blog, only a small part of me will miss it. i won't miss rushing through bedtime with my kids and not listening in while The Marsh reads them their stories so that i can write. i won't miss not paying attention to the first half hour of a movie i'm trying to watch with The Marsh because i'm writing. and i won't miss feeling guilty if i didn't get a chance to write a new entry. it's been a year. i'm ready to let go. and just live my life knowing i'm grateful for something or several things every day.

but i'll end it by saying this. I am grateful for this blog. I'm grateful for the influence it's had on me over the last year. and i'm so grateful for all of my amazing friends and family who have taken the time to read it and laugh with me and at me for the last 365 days. I love you all, and i am truly blessed and grateful to have had all of you go on this adventure with me.

Thank you for reading, I was so grateful. every. single. day.

Thanks for reading!(for the last time)
Lana