Mustache.

Woah.

Sorry about the no post last night.

it was completely unintentional. The Marsh got me completely absorbed in this climbing Mt. Everest movie and I just completely forgot. People dying on a mountain will do that to ya.

anyway. so tonight I'll be grateful for two things. first up, what i had originally planned to blog about last night...

I am grateful that my washing machine is only sort of fucked broken. It's been acting funny for awhile, and then yesterday morning it just completely died. and then my basement started to smell like it was going to burn down.

good times.

so The Marsh called Sears to have them come take a look at it. at first we thought it was the motor or transmition. and it was going to cost more than the freaking thing was worth to replace either one of those parts. so the repair guy gave The Marsh a coupon for $100.00 off any new appliance and we were going to send him on his merry way. well he ended up discovering right before he left, that it was actually the timer that had something wrong with it, and he basically showed The Marsh how to replace it himself. after he left, The Marsh actually did one better and has managed to fix the thing to a point. the only really bad thing right now is that the washing machine won't actually shut off by itself when it's running, so someone has to be home to stop it. but since i spend about 98% of my life in this house, thats not really a problem. and it buys us a little bit more time before we need to get a new one. so....I'm grateful for that.

and TONIGHT, I'm grateful because my father-in-law is FINALLY able to take a break from chemo.

He's been having chemo since, what? like feb. now I think? and that's just a long time. chemo takes a huge toll on his body. he's always feeling sick because of it and he isn't able to see my children as much. and of course, he also lost all of his hair which up until this point he had managed to keep. it's just been unpleasant all around. we've been a little worried about him for our up coming trip to disney world in october, because having the chemo every 3 weeks he hasn't been able to recover from all of it at all. he's weak, and we didn't want the trip to be too much for him, but with a few months with no chemo, hopefully he'll be feeling much better and be able to gain some of his strength back.

the doctors decided after taking another scan of him today that his body was pretty much done responding to this particular chemo cocktail he's been on. it's done a pretty good job at breaking up his lymphoma, but he's pretty much plateaued at this point. which isn't necessarily a bad thing. they're just going to let his body rest for a few months, gain back some strength and then if need be they'll put him on a new type of chemo in the next few months.

but i'm grateful that he gets to take a break for a little bit. hopefully feel better and really enjoy our vacation.and i'm grateful that he'll get a chance to grow some of his hair back. it's already starting to come in. and dude is finally rocking a killer mustache again.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Stargazers.

Today I am grateful for Stargazer Lillies.

They are absolutely without a doubt my favorite flower of all time.

and as of yesterday? I've got them blooming in my yard.

AHHH!

You have no idea how excited I am about this. I didn't transplant them. they are not in a pot. I grew them from bulbs. This feels like one of the greatest accomplishments of my life.

They are just so beautiful. They also happen to be the very first thing i ever planted after we bought our house. I actually planted them last spring, but they didn't make it up in time for the season, so this is the first time they've bloomed since I planted them over a year ago.

I'm so grateful they bloomed and are so beautiful. I just love looking at them and it gives my heart this weird kind of peace to know that they will continuously rebloom every year. i guess it just helps solidify in my mind that I own this house. and this land. and i won't be going anywhere else anytime soon. so every july for the next however many years I will be able to stand next to my fence and marvel at my beautiful stargazer lillies.

yea. i'm definately grateful for that.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Cool Whip.

Today I am grateful for Cool Whip.

AWWWWW YEAAAAA!

I love Cool Whip.

and you know what is even better? when you forget that you even have Cool Whip. completely untouched, never been opened, still sealed in the package of god damn deliciousness it came in Cool Whip.

le sigh.

 i could really keep going on.. I mean I have a few loves in my life. The Marsh. my babes. nutella. and I'm telling you Cool Whip is right up there at the top of the list.

i know what you're thinking. If I love Cool Whip so much, how did i forget that i have some? I'm a Mom. I'm lucky if I remember to put pants on.

but today little miss georgie for whatever reason was going on about how when we go to the grocery store we need to get milk. and whip cream.(she is SOOO my daughter)  and the minute whip cream came out of her mouth and was like "OHMYGODTHEREISSTILLCOOLWHIPINMYREFRIGERATOR!!!!" just like that. all one big run on sentence in my mind.

I would say that i'm a bit ashamed as to how quickly i made my way to my refrigerator to make sure my Cool Whip hating husband hadn't tossed it out, but i'm really not. it was an emergency people. and yes, it was still there. TODAY IS A DAY OF GLORY.

okay, i'm done now. but i needed you all to know my love for cool whip.

and you all already know i'm always grateful for food.

so yea.

good times.

and i'm going to go now to end all the crazy awkwardness about my love for Cool Whip.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Victory!

You see this man?

This is my dad. (and my son who is looking extremely adorable and extemely little. i'm actually crying all over my keyboard at how young he looks here)

and my dad? he. is. awesome.

today i am grateful for my dad.

 why?

because he gave me the hook up to the olympics.

I don't have cable at my house. and between the internet and netflix, I really haven't missed it at all. until the olymipic games have started. all I wanted to do the other day was watch the women's USA vs. Frace soccer match. you think that would be possible with all the technology on the web now right. and there was NBC all "hey look over here! we have live streaming!" yea. if you pay for a tv service. bastards.

but thanks to my dad (who may or may not have slipped me his user name and password for his paid tv service) I won't be missing anymore of the games.

hopefully.

this is sort of contingent on two computers being allowed to simultaneously use the same user name and password. he made it pretty clear that if only one computer is allowed on at a time, I am up the creek. but the hope is that this will work. and I will be watching the games. so i'm extremely grateful to my dad for making this possible for me. especially when tomorrow the olympics kicks off with my top three favorite sports to watch: men's swimming, men's gymnastics, and women's soccer.

I am exterememly stoked.

on every possible level.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Paranoia, Paranoia.

Have I mentioned yet that I'm Paranoid?

about you know, everything?

and I happen to feed my paranoia on occasion.

I can't help it, it's like a sickness.

and tonight's giant helping of Paranoia came in the form of Nature's Deadliest: Brazil.

you see I am entirely too scared of animals. I mean bears are adorable right? but that doesn't mean that they won't eat you. and sure Great White's may not be "man eaters" but that hasn't stopped them from eating a man on occasion. so I tend to avoid the woods. and the water. and after watching that documentary I'm seriously questioning whether or not I will ever actually make it to Brazil.

BLECK!

killer bees and frogs and spiders and snaked and scopions and FREAKING SNAILS!

that's right... snails! there is a sea snail in Brazil that is literally one of the deadliest marine animals in the world. as if I didn't already need another excuse to NEVER go back into the ocean. and caterpillars! I can't even begin to describe the horrible death these nasty little creatures cause. i may be traumatized for life.

so what does all this animal paranoia have to do with being grateful? I'm extremely grateful that all of those creepy animals LIVE IN BRAZIL! and not around this sleepy little town that I live in. My brother mentioned the other day in passing while we were hiking that he was glad there were no venomous snakes or spiders in the woods. and after watcing that program I am doubly grateful. I couldn't imagine walking around knowing something so deadly could be lurking anywhere. or being terrified of reaching for a bunch of bananas. I'm also extremely grateful that i don't have to worry about my babies playing outside because of god knows what being out there. so maybe living in a small new england town isn't exactly exciting, but paranoid people like me tend to like life just a little bit better that way.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

The Best Medicine.

Today I am grateful for laughter.

the best medicine.

more specifically my son's laughter.

Isn't he adorable?

he has the cutest laugh you have ever heard too. and netflix has three new How to Train Your Dragon "short films" on Netflix instant viewing right now that are cracking this kid up. and I mean really cracking him up. I haven't heard him laugh like that while watching a cartoon in a long time. it was completely infecious. The Marsh and I were both laughing so hard jut because of his laugh. again i repeat, it was adorable.

Now i haven't exactly been feeling under the weather or anything, but I am completely convinced after listening to his little laugh for 15 minutes straight that the old saying "Laughter is the best medicine" is absolutely true. and I'm grateful that i've got such a wonderful little laugh to listen to in case I'm ever feeling a bit feverish.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Optimus Prime.

Today I am grateful for Optimus Prime.

because sometimes having two toddlers is hard.

even though one really isn't a toddler anymore but we're not really talking about or aknowledging that in any way

it's hard everyday.

granted some days are alot harder than others, but i would never really call it easy. they are loud. and crazy. and they beat the crap out of each other.

and even though they have a playroom, a classroom, and a bedroom to keep their toys in...SOMEHOW they still end up all over my living room. and this drives me insane. I always step on them. or the kids always step on them. and things get broken. or the toys are just so loud and obnoxious and never shut up. and when i spend all day cleaning and picking up my living room just to have it covered in toys less than five minutes later? IT MAKES ME WANT TO SHOUT IN CAPITOL LETTERS!

the last few nights in order spare some of my sanity i've been picking up the kid's toys while The Marsh is reading them their bedtime story. the hope is that this will prevent me from being such a cranky bitch when i first wake up in the morning because my house isn't quite as much of a mess. it seems to be working.

so how does Optimus Prime fit into this?

you see, sometimes it's just so easy to focus on the fact that that two toddlers is hard.

sometimes all i can see are the toys on the floor.

but then in the middle of picking up my son's robots, one of them just happens to belts out "I am Optimus Prime." and as silly as it sounds, it actually made me smile. because in in that moment i thought about how much Breyman loves Optimus Prime and his toys. I thought about how special it is that my babes are still at an age where they love to play and use their imagination. I thought about how awesome it is that my kids actually have some pretty cool toys and how even though it pisses me off when they're all over the floor, i would take toys everywhere and happy children over an immaculate but empty house any day. i think

So I'm grateful to Optimus Prime for helping me see the "bigger picture".

and helping me remember that this is only one very small moment in time. and someday their wont be any more toys laying all over my house at all.

and yea we're still not talking about it.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

A Feeling.

Today I am grateful for a feeling.

This feeling said "Lana, you need to get your ass outside and up on a mountain."

yes. my feelings swear too.

so I thought about this feeling for a minute. and then decided i was going to follow through with it. so I sent my brother a text to see if he was up for a little light hiking and away we went.

ha.

hahahaa.

hahahahahhaahaha.

light hiking. that's rich.

so the mountain that we originally planned on hiking didn't seem to be marked super clearly (and also kind of seemed lame) so we decided to keep following some different trails over on the neighboring mountain. and then was saw a sign that said Ocean Lookout 0.7 miles. My brother and i decided that sounded like a good place to head for and eat lunch. of course, it just happened to be 0.7 miles straight up. man. i need to get back in some serious shape. i thought i was going to have a heart attack.

but i knew it was going to be worth it. the higher we kept climbing, i knew i wouldn't regret it.

and man, was i right,

the view was just amazing.

it actually made my heart hurt.

or maybe that was just me recovering from my mini heart attack

even my brother looked a little emotional at the thought of being somewhere so beautiful, knowing that you had to do something physically challenging to get there.

some nice man took out picture for us. and we ate our lunch before hiking our way back down. and even if i managed to fall on my butt once on the way down, i didn't regret for one single second going on that hike today. I knew when i was sitting up on that cliff and was looking out at the ocean that i was grateful for that moment. grateful for how beautiful everything is where i live. grateful i only have to drive an hour for this spectacular view. grateful that despite what i may think sometimes I was actually in good enough shape to make it to the top. grateful that my brother was there to tackle that trail with me. and grateful that i listened to that feeling that said this is what you are going to do today. you are going to climb a mountain.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Hulk Smash.

Did you ever have one of THOSE days.

you know those days. when everything just kind of pisses you off for no apparent reason. and not just a little bit. but a lot?

I feel like that has been my day today.

on repeat. like i've lived this day of horrible pissiness 10 times over. it's the freaking Groundhog Day of be being pissed.

and I honestly can't even begin to describe it. is the moon too close to the earth or something? something crazy about the tides? god knows. but let me just give you a tiny summary.

I woke up.

AND WAS PISSED.

I was angry that my living room was a wreck. and that the dishes needed to be washed.

and my kids's bedroom needed to be cleaned like woah. and then i got angry anytime my kids even so much as breathed in my general direction while cleaning said room.

and I broke three freaking fingernails after OF COURSE just thinking to myself how awesome they were actually doing for once.

and then i got on facebook and was crazy pissed at all the people who are taking this horrible tragedy that happened in Colorado and turning it into a political circus.

and then my mother's consevative father called me closed minded. CLOSED MINDED! I have been called alot of things in my life. but i believe that was a first. so naturally, that made me angry too. I had to walk away. before i turned into a giant green rage monster.

and then i was angry because i was doing dishes. and really..is anyone ever actually happy about doing the dishes? that should be sort of like a freebie. because dishes just make people angry in general. but of course in the middle of doing dishes Miss G wanted a drink. and she wanted Sunny D. and then was like "MOM! I said i wanted apple juice!" in her completely annoyed three year old voice.

i have no idea where she gets that from.

AND The Marsh left the rest of his chinese food on the counter last night. so I had to throw that away. which wouldn't make me angry (I don't even really like chinese food that much) but I was all paranoid that he would be angry that I threw it away. and got my self all worked up about that. by the time he got home i was all in a state like "if he says one word about that freaking chinese food I am going to throw a shoe at him!" execpt not because I had just picked up all the shoes from my living room..so if one ended up in said living room again to be handy i would have been pissed. AGAIN. and of course, he didn't even mention is so it was all a moot point anyway.

and things seemed to finally even out. and i had a dr. pepper float. we've already established that helps.

but of course The Marsh is working a double tomorrow. so he decided to catch up on his sleep this evening. which in truth i wasn't really bothered by. even when I ended up pissed off again because the children tried to destroy their bedroom after i spent all afternoon cleaning it. BUT when he woke up he may or may not have found an entire roll of toilet paper in the sink curtesy of the babes. and he was all like "guys, i know i took a nap but that's not an excuse to make the house a mess!"

and there i was.

back at the begining.

because if my motherfucking house managed to stay mess free when that man was awake...i wouldn't have woken up so pissed off this morning.

but thanks babe, for all the cleaning you do. IN YOUR MIND!

and to make my life so much better, i have been sitting here slightly freaked out by the fact that my cat is sitting in the window staring out at something. and now i can smell the freaking skunk smell making it's way in.

great.

so you know what i'm grateful for today?

tomorrow.

I'm grateful that i have one to look forward to. and I'm grateful that even being completely pissed off all day my life seriously isn't that bad. but right now I just want to be angry.

It's my blog and i'll be angry if i want to.

but hopefully tomorrow I'll be better.

please.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Fireworks.

Today I am grateful for fireworks.

because tonight right before the babes' bedtime, we had an impromtu fireworks display right outside the house.

You see, fireworks have been illegal to buy and set off in my state forever. not that that's stopped the occasional person from buying some across state lines and setting them off before, but it's certainly never been a very common occurance around here. up until a few months ago, that is, when buying and playing with fireworks became legal around these parts.

now, several towns have actually placed laws against fireworks use, so they're not exactly running rampant. but you do hear the booms a bit more frequently. especially where I happen to live right by a river. the sound of fireworks can carry down a river for miles.

I haven't personally been affected in any way really by the sudden allowance of fireworks, but i know a couple co-workers have mentioned how obnoxious they can be where your neighbors are setting them off all the time. Like i said, that really hasn't been much of a concern for me. mostly because I'm pretty sure I live in one of those towns that have banned the fireworks.

apparently this guy wasn't going to let that stop him.

around 9:20 pm or so I heard the first boom. I looked out the window, not really expecting to see much of anything, but sure enough, right over the trees I saw them. Of course I had to shout for the babes to come see them. and after a minute or two The Marsh and I realized this guy was setting off a TON of fireworks, so The Marsh got up and shut the lights off. The Kids stood in the windows and I sat on my couch and we took in a 10 minute fireworks show. right in my living room! and they actually were pretty spectacular, with a mini grand finale and everything. I don't care what you say, that's pretty freaking cool. It was also super conveniently timed, because it was literally right before B & G's bedtime. so we ended the night with fireworks and then a bedtime story.

seriously. how can you NOT be grateful for that? fireworks that you can watch....and then not have to walk back to the car and wait in traffic to drive home and carry sleeping children into their beds? oh yes. i am grateful.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

For Hire.

Today I am grateful for employment.

not for me.

although I am completely grateful for my job. it pays well, allows me to work only two days a week, and gives me social adult interaction. so yes, i'm grateful for my job.

but I'm grateful today for someone else being employed. Specifically? my sister emily. she's been trying to get a job for a while now, but of course the economy isn't exactly booming. especially around these parts. I know that she's been stressed since graduation about finding one and hasn't had much luck hearing back about anything.

BUT, last week she got a call for an interview.

and today? she got the call that she was being hired. the hours aren't bad and the pay is great. I'm really excited for her because she is currently in the process of trying to get her first apartment. this will certainly help.

and while I'm being grateful for one employed sibling, I should be grateful for another. my brother came home from the military about a year and a half ago. and because of said lack of booming economy, he hasn't had a steady job since.

BUT, a few weeks ago he also managed to get a good steady job as well.

 I'm happy for him. and I'm happy for her. and I'm also happy for my parents whom I am sure are breathing a little bit easier now that all of their children are currently employed again.

reasons to be grateful all around.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Yes. We've already established I'm a Geek.

Today I am grateful for a gift.

That I was actually given a couple weeks ago now.

It's shameful really that I am just now getting around to blogging it.

I'm such a bad sister.

A couple weeks ago my lil' sister, Emily, gave me a t-shirt as her way of saying Thank You for hosting her graduation party. it was completely sweet of her because I in no way expected anything from her for it. I was happy to give her a wonderful graduation day. after all you only graduate from high school once, right?

but, I'm not going to lie, I really love my gift. there wasn't even a moment of "you shouldn't have..." because seriously, I needed this t-shirt in my life. So what exactly is so awesome about this shirt you ask?

Isn't it beautiful?

The shirts are holding hands! My life is complete.

I love it.

Today I finally upcycled it into a racerback tank so it's even more amazing! and yes, my sister knew I was going to do this, so I didn't just start cutting up her gift like a crazy person. I was just improving on it's awesomness. I'm hoping that the power of Kirk's flying leg kicks and Mr. Spock's laser focus will help me out with my yoga. cause if there is anybody I want to help me with my workouts it's them. okay so maybe it might also be Legolas. don't judge.

of course instead of taking my new upcycled shirt for a yoga test drive I sat on my deck with my nook, some music, and a glass of wine.

I'm grateful for that too. :0)

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Spontaneous Lyric Rephrases?

Today I am grateful for ad libbing..?

or maybe spontaneous lyric rephrases?

I'm not exactly sure what you call it.

The Marsh has this horribly obnoxious habit of changing song lyrics to whatever his liking is at that particular moment. and when I say obnoxious, i mean it. nothing kills Elton John faster than The Marsh's rendition of "Hold me closer Tony Danza." just saying. and while i do on occasion get completely irritated with him for doing it while I'm trying to listen to a song, i have to admit i'm usually quite impressed with his ability to come up with new lyrics on the spot the way he does. however ridiculous.

although.

he actually has one about a possible pervy frosty the snowman.

It was the funniest fucking thing in the entire world traumatized.

I'm sure my toddlers are still scarred.

So why, if I find this particular habit if his so completely UNcharming, am i grateful for it today?

well. we were listening to Pay Phone by Maroon 5. If you are unfamiliar with the song here are some of the lyrics...

If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of it.
One more stupid love song, I'll be sick

and The Marsh? he doesn't really like depressing down in the dumps type songs. so he started singing his own song. I was just getting ready to tell him to quit it when he sang...

If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would be living at (insert our current address here)
All those fairy tales are full of win,
And I'll be reading them to my kids....

I know.

He's the biggest dork in the entire world.

but he's my dork.

and I'm not gonna lie, him singing those made up lyrics definately brought a smile to my face. he's just too sweet for his own good.

so tonight i'm grateful for The Marsh's little fake songs. and our own "happy ever after" taking place right here in our home.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Little Miracles.

Today I am grateful for little miracles.

sometimes the world we live in seems so hopeless. and unfair.

I created this blog to help me remember to be grateful for all the wonderful things that I have in my life when things seems a little bit tougher than usual.

but even being grateful for something everyday doesn't stop the hurt when someone you love is going through something that you know is killing them a little bit, whether literally or figuratively, on the inside.

and in those moments of hurt all i can do is tell those people that i love them.

be extremely grateful for what i have in my own life.

and pray that maybe God (or whomever is out there listening) knows that some people really do deserve little miracles.

Cue our amazing best friends Warren and Wendy.

In my previous post about how amazing they are I mentioned that we spent the night with them after a particularly emotional week, but i didn't go into any detail. and while i still don't plan on sharing all of their personal trials with all of my readers, i want to give you a little back story...just so you can appreciate my level of gratitude at this very moment.

Warren and Wendy have been trying to have a baby.

for many years.

and yet, they still don't have one.

it's been heartbreaking. and emotional. and i've never wished for anything more for anyone in my life then i have wished for them to have a baby.

after years of trying to have their own they decided to possibly foster. and took in the most adorable little girl name Jade. She pretty much became the light of their lives. They had so much love to give this little three year old girl, and you could see how much Jade loved them back. and right when everything looked perfect, all the stars had aligned for them to adopt this little girl....her mother got her parental rights back. and then they didn't have beautiful Jade with them anymore.

They talked about invitro. they were still seeing Jade on the weekends but it got to be too much. and then finally all within the same week they decided enough was enough. no invitro. no more seeing jade. just enough. (maybe "emotional week" is a bit of an understatement) Ladies and Gentlemen, this is what no hope looks like.

and that's when miracles happen.

On friday afternoon Wendy got a call from DHHS. and they told her that Jade's mom's rights were being terminated. and they wanted Warren and Wendy to come pick up Jade so that they could take her home and adopt her.

amazing, right?

Oh it gets better. Jade also has a little sister who is six months old. and they asked if Warren and Wendy would be willing to adopt the baby as well.

Just when I start to think about how unfair life is...something like this happens and reminds me how amazing and wonderful this world really can be.

This isn't going to be a cake walk for them. They did just inherit two little girls, one of them a BABY overnight. it's going to be a huge adjustment. and let's just say that the mom didn't exactly go quietly into the night. the fact that Warren and Wendy even managed to get the girls from her is a miracle in itself. I'm sure that unfortunately there is going to be a constant battle there.

But tonight i don't want to think about all the "what ifs" or how hard this journey is going to be for them. I want to think about how absolutely amazing it is that they even have the chance to go on this journey at all.

and I am grateful for their little miracles.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

60.

Today I am grateful for 60.

because that is how old my father-in-law turned today.

60 years old.

Sometimes I'm so amazed by how fucking unfair life can be.

All this time he's been fighting off this horrible disease. and he's been 59 years old.

Believe me when I say, we're all eternally grateful and blessed that we celebrated his 60th birthday with him tonight.

Brey and Georgie were happy to help him blow out his candles.

and eat some of his boston creme pie cake.

The Marsh was extremely grateful to spend his dad's 60th birthday with him.

and I spend a little bit of time praying everyday that we get to celebrate his 61st.

That will be something to be grateful for indeed.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Post Party Problems.

Today I am grateful that my eyes no longer feel like they are trying to climb out of my head.

Let me explain.

We had a big gathering at my momma's house last night.

It was amazingly fun. and we had a super great turn out. Lots of friend's and my immediately family celebrating the fouth of july about a week and a hal too late. cause that's how we roll around here.

I had a fabulous time and had quite a few margaritas and there was kereoke and a hot tub. the perfect mix for a friday night party. i crawled into bed (and when I say "bed" i mean my momma's couch) at somewhere around 5:00 this morning.

Two hours later, I wanted to die.

no, i wasn't hung over. or suddenly experiencing any delayed sickness from drinking. it was my eyes. they felt like they were literally on fire. burning their way out of my fucking head. my only thought was that it was some sort of delayed reaction to the chemicals in the hot tub. this was reinforced by the fact that when I rubbed my eyes with my hands (which i hadn't washed since being in the hot tub) my eyes felt even worse. i don't even know how at that point it was possible for them to hurt more. but apparently anything is possible. I tried just keeping my eyes closed. I really didn't want to get up and deal with them because like i said, i had only been asleep for about two hours. but after laying there for another hour or so I had to get up. tears were constantly streaming down my face. i wiped my eyes with a wet paper towel. i used a wet wash cloth and even flushed the shit out of them at the sink for a while. nothing really seemed to help. i was doomed to endure blood shot eys and painful tears for the next several hours.

and I AM SO GRATEFUL THAT THEY ARE FEELING BETTER NOW. They still bothered me for hours, but somewhere around 5:00 this afternoon i took a quick 45 minute cat nap and when i woke up my eyes finally felt a little bit better. i'm convinced i put myself into a Vulcan Healing Trance. it's the only explanation for such a miracle occuring.

they are still slightly blood shot. and a little bit scratchy. but the level of pain is no where near the same. and i am so grateful for that. i'll also be extremely grateful if the universe could decided to not play that particular joke on me anytime soon. I would really appreciate it.

Universe-1, Alana-0

damn it.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Beach Day.

Today I am grateful for the BEAUTIFUL weather we had.

The Marsh was off from work and we took the babes to the beach.

They went crazy. running around in the sand. splashing in the water. picking up sea shells. generally tiring themselves out.

they fell asleep about 30 seconds after laying down for bed.

I'm grateful for that too.

I'm also grateful for my amazing beach umbrella and my snazzy new beach sun hat. because while all the sand castle building, water splashing, and sea shell collecting in the sunshine was going on, i was completely comfortable on my blanket in the shade reading a book. it was a beautiful thing. to sit on the beach and not feel like i'm going to die. or get third degree burns. or sun poisoning.

awesome.

of course this meant that The Marsh was on full punk #1 and punk #2 duty, as I was having a date with Robert Langdon. but he had fun chasing the babes around, and they always enjoy spending some time with dad. it was a win-win situation really.

But now it's time for bed for this girl, because obviously sitting on a shaded blanket, reading a good book next to the ocean is obviously hard work. and i'm tired.

OH! and i would also like to say that I'm completely grateful to live in a coastal state. because even though I really don't care for water and the ocean may or may not scare the crap out of me, i honestly couldn't imagine living some place where the ocean wasn't a short drive away. it blows my mind that there are people in the world who have never even seen the ocean outside of pictures and tv. so yea. I'm grateful for that too.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Skype.

Today I am grateful for Skype.

I can't even believe that I'm actually saying this.

or typing it, rather.

but it's true.

A couple years ago my good friend Corey tried to convince me to get skype so that I could talk to him after he moved to Washington D.C. for grad school. and because I'm a shitty friend a little bit afraid of certain technologies, I never actually downloaded it. and he's since moved back home now, so I figured I was in the clear. I no longer had to worry about it, right? wrong.

cue my best friend going to London for five weeks.

now, the semi-hilarious part of all of this, is that my best friend actually lives in Boston. Two states away from where I currently live. so it's not like we "see" each other all the time anyway. although we do suprisingly enough make quite a bit of time for one another. but we're used to alot of our conversations being on the phone for the most part.

but with her going to London talking on the phone is harder. she has an international phone she is using for right now, but it's easy to just message online. or it was until she forced  asked me to get skype so that we could chat via our webcams.

I've seen yahoo instant messenger via webcam and such before, but i never took a moment to really appreciate the amazingness of all this technology.

This morning I had a conversation face to face with my best friend over my morning coffee. The fact that she is on a completely different continent? no biggie.

I'd go so far as to say i feel a little silly i never downloaded skype before, but i'm really not. i think i just needed something important to download it for. Kristy going to London was the push i needed. and i'm just so grateful for it now. to talk to her. and see her. and know that she's safe over there. to hear her funny stories and listen to her talk about the crown jewels and be able to see her facial expressions? amazing.

I'm also grateful that i finally broke down and downloaded it because now when Kristy gets back to the states we're going to be able to have coffee dates more often. she is starting grad school in the fall, so any trips back home with most likely be very infrequent. i'm looking foward to being able to skype with her when she has a few down moments.

oh old technology that feels new to me..how i love thee.

Thanks for reading!

Lana

Self Defense.

Today I am grateful for my friend Wendy.

and for her begining to understand what it means to be a corrections officer's wife.

poor baby.

she has no idea what she's in for.

Actually I'm more grateful for the laugh I got out of her new found appreciation, more than her actual new found appreciation. does that makes sense? everyone with me? no? bueller?

okay. so The Marsh's best friend Warren has recently started working at the same facility as The Marsh. and his wife Wendy has been very excited for him. up until now. why not so much anymore? because yesterday and today were self defense training days. and Warren, like every other typical male had to run right home and try out his cool new moves. on Wendy.

and us wives? we try to be supportive. "sure hun, you can practice on me.."

NOPE.

it's all fun and games until someone's wrist almost gets broken. seriously.

and I really do understand the poor girl's pain. The Marsh? he's the self defense INSTRUCTOR.

that's right. he's the one teaching all these crazy boys how to pick on their wives take down some inmates.

of course, The Marsh had to become an instructor as he was informed that he shall never be practicing on me. EVER. AGAIN. and if he wanted to beat people up for fun, he could find someone else to do it too. and he did. he went to the police academy for a week and became certified to instruct. it also means that he's the one who taught Warren his fancy new moves.

so where in all this does my great big laugh at Wendy's expense about learning to be a corrections officer's wife come in? I got a text from her tonight. it said "Tell Marsh I send a big Eff you his way for showing Warren all those self defense moves!"

I'm not ashamed to say i laughed. hard. so did The Marsh. he isn't even a little bit sorry.

and I'm kind of not either. as long as The Marsh is teaching other guys self-defense, he's keeping his own skills honed. so there is no reason for him to start thinking he needs a sparing buddy at home. that shit is not happening.

on the other hand, if The Marsh and Warren did feel the need to be all manly and practice self-defense.. at least they have each other. so I guess I would say I'm grateful for that too.

and Wendy Darling?

Welcome to the club.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Whatever Floats Your Boat.

Today I am grateful to whomever the hell it was that thought adding ice cream to soda would be a good idea.

because it was.

definately the best. idea. ever.

I say "whomever the hell it was" because i tried googling that shit, but more than one dude is trying to take credit. and I don't like confrontation.

seriously. where did the idea come from? Was some guy like "damn it, this root beer isn't cold and i have no ice! but i do have ice cream!"? I dunno. but he's brilliant, i tell you.

now, I don't drink root beer floats. because that's just gross. but i have on occasion enjoyed a diet coke float. or an orange soda float. god. that sounds good right now too. it's like one big creamsicle float. OKAY. back on topic. so while i do enjoy them, i don't actually drink them very often. The Marsh is the big float drinker in this house, not me. I drink wine. but tonight i was craving something sweet. and The Marsh was kind enough to buy French Vanilla ice cream instead of Old Fashioned Vanilla (it seriously makes a difference, i'm telling you what) so i felt like it might be a good time to indulge.

oh my god.

it was so overdue.

and it was a Dr. Pepper float, no less.

I don't even like Dr. Pepper.

but this float? amazing.

okay, so it probably wasn't earth shattering or anything. just plain old fashioned delicious. but it was a fantastic ending to my night, after watching The Marsh burn a bunch more pine needles and using all the smoke as a bug force field so that we could eat a nice dinner out on the deck. A perfect ending to a long day.

And I'm always grateful for happy endings.

...wait, what?

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Killer Tofu.

Today I am grateful for Killer Tofu.

no.

this is not a food.

please tell me you know what killer tofu is...well, i guess if you weren't a child of the 90s you probably wouldn't know. and if that's the case, i feel bad for ya.

Killer Tofu is a song. by The Beets. Who are The Beets? They are a fictional band from the show Doug, that i used to watch everynight growing up.

Man. I loved that freaking show. and one of the best parts of that show, was this band (The Beets) that all the kids on the show were obsessed with. and the band had actual songs...like killer tofu. they also had other such memorable hits like Banging on a Trash Can and I Need More Allowance.

oh man. I'm seriously singing them all in my head like one giant mash up while writing this post.

now, i guess it seems a little silly, being grateful for a song by a fictional band, but it the song represents more than just that show, you know? I was standing in my kitchen chopping up onions when suddenly Killer Tofu just popped into my head. it was just there, and i couldn't stop singing it. I think part of the reason it came to mind was because my punks were watching The Rugrats Movie, and I used to watch Doug and Rugrats back to back when i was younger. I even remember that they were on at 7:00 and 7:30 at night, although I can't rememeber now which one came first.

but that's not really the point. the point is that for a few minutes it was nice to recall a time when life a little simpler. being a kid and lounging in the living room with my brother and sister to watch these silly shows every night before bed. and while i have NO DESIRE what so ever to go back in time and do all that madness over again, i'm occasionaly grateful for moments like today when all I want to do is sing Killer Tofu because it reminds me that being a child was once an awesome thing.

I also gratful to youtube for having said songs available to listen to. thank you technology for helping me rock out to The Beets how ever many years later.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Magic.

Today I am grateful for Magic.

Mike, that is.

yes, I was one of THOSE women. those crazy women who flock to the theater in hopes of seeing some serious naked Channing Tatum action.

there was lots of delicious abs and booties to be seen.

it was fabulous, Darling. absolutely fabulous.

Naked men aside, it was also extremely funny. and hinted at deeper drug issues, making it a very good movie all around. there was also a very loud woman sitting behind my mother and i in the movie theater who made the entire experience worth it by herself. she was not a shy woman. during the previews she had no problem yelling out "i want the naked men now!" and she kept the commentary running through the whole movie. I'm sure everyone in the theater now knows that Channing Tatum could probably do whatever he wanted to that woman.

It was definatley a fun friday night movie and I'm glad that I went with my mom. sometimes it's good to have a fun mother/daughter date right? i couldn't have possibly picked a better date night than watching Channing Tatum, Matthew McConaughey, Joe Manganiello, and Matthew Bomer all dancing half naked to It's Raining Men on the big screen. unless of course there was someway for that to happen in real life....

you hear that god of half naked sexy strippers? Make it so.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Some Like it Hot.

Today I am grateful for salsa.

but not just any salsa...Kelly's Salsa.

Kelly is a lady with whom I work with. She's incredibly funny, a hard worker, and just an overall wonderful person. She's the kind of co-worker you wish all your other co-workers were like.  so i guess, I'm not just grateful for salsa, I'm grateful for Kelly as well. Just for being her.

BUT...one of the many talents that Kelly has is her salsa making skills.

I can't even begin to describe to you how awesome her salsa is. or how much i love it. juts know that it's alot. and I've been in love with it for YEARS. my mom has worked with Kelly for a very long time, so I've had the benefit of getting some of her salsa on occasion for years. it's always the greatest of treats.

Last week or the week before, Miss Kelly brought in some salsa for the office to munch on as a way of cleaning out her stock before making some new batches with this years tomatoes. I wasn't lucky enough to be there that day because I only work two days a week. But that kelly, she's awesome. She knows how much i enjoy the hotter salsa that she makes and she felt bad that I wouldn't be getting any. So when I came into work on friday morning, there wrapped in a bag waiting on my mom's desk with my name on it was a whole jar of salsa. just for me. I suppose it's silly to get that excited about salsa, but it was a gift. and i think it's always nice to receive a gift from someone who's taking you into consideration. so excitement was definately warranted.

so why am i so grateful for a gift i received a week or two ago? because I have just now gotten around to trying some tonight. I haven't had any tortilla chips in my house and tonight when I went grocery shopping I made a point to pick some up with the sole purpose of eating that salsa tonight. I would have actually eaten it by itself, but it really is on the warmer side..and while i enjoy the hottness immensely with chips, i don't think i could eat it by itself. not without a giant glass of milk anyway. and salsa really is meant to be enjoyed as condiment. not a main dish. it was absolutely fabulous by the way. i enjoyed every bite.

so tonight i'm grateful for some awesome salsa. because everyone should always be grateful for a nice gift.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Happy Fourth of July.

Today I am grateful for some amazing family fun.

Today is Independence Day.

and while it's a day to celebrate the freedom that we have in this country, it's also become the day to eat BBQ, drink, and spend time with family. maybe take in a parade or watch the fireworks.

well, the local parade around here has sort of sucked big time lately, so The Marsh and I opted out of taking the kids to that sad madness, knowing that in a few weeks, the summer festivals will start and their parades are always better. and I'm not even sure if there are going to be fireworks tonight, because it's been raining for hours. BUT we did head over to my in-laws and spend the afternoon with them.

so here is what i'm grateful for today...

I'm grateful that B & G have reached an age where they will willingly let me take their picture together...

ADORABLE.

I'm grateful that my father-in-law was feeling well enough to come sit outside and enjoy the nice weather with us...

why yes, that is a mike's margarita in his hand.

I'm again grateful those freaking pink sunglasses I got in Boston a couple weekends ago...

although The Marsh gets all wigged out when he can't see my eyes. so he feels the need to lift them up when I take our picture.

I'm grateful for finding out what a pyro my mother-in-law obviously is...

yes. those are all sparklers. and such.

and I'm grateful that all of those resulted in this...

continuously trying to set the lawn on fire.

and I'm grateful for my sister-in-law trying to act as a human shield against the smoke....

because in this picture she looks like the biggest stoner ever. i got a good laugh about it.

so basically I'm grateful for the whole day. it was fun. there was music. and good food. and good drinks. and family. it never gets any better than that, does it?

Thanks for reading!
Lana

July 3, 2006.

Today I am grateful for July 3, 2006.

because that was the day I met The Marsh.

exactly six years ago today.

Sometimes it's so unbelievable to think we've been together for six years now. and yes, I say together, even though it was the day we met. because i would without a doubt say the we have been together since that moment. i'm not even going to try and say that we just didn't know it yet. we did. we both knew the minute we met that this was it. game over. i belonged to him and he belonged to me. there just wasn't any other option.

it seems amazing to think about everything we've been through together since then. moving in together, getting engaged and getting married. twice. having brey and then georgiana. living in a crappy apartment for years and then managing to buy our first house together. it seems impossible some days that we've been together long enough to accomplish all that. some days it seems impossible that we ever existed before there was a "we". I feel like i have always been with him. We've been together for 6 minutes. We've been together for 6 years. We've been together for 60 years. It all seems to coexist for at the same time. but i guess the only thing that matters in that sentence is "We've been together...."

I'm also grateful today for one teensy tiny petty reason. but...this is my blog, so i'm allowed to be petty on occasion right? right. Being with The Marsh for six years is HUGE. why? well, this girl right here has never managed to hold on to a long term relationship anywhere past a year before The Marsh. and to be fair, i met him when i was 18..so there wasn't any real need to have a relationship longer than that leading up to meeting him. But The Marsh. oh The Marsh. he does long term very well. in fact, his last relationship before me lasted for five and half years. that's right five and a half years.

guess who just officially became his longest relationship.

VALIDATION!!!!

okay, so i don't really need to be validated. we're married. we have babies. we bought a house. i know he isn't going to up and leave me and i certainly don't habor any thoughts that he might ever think about his ex. but i'm not going to lie, i like knowing that he's been with me longer than he's been with anyone else. i guess we can call that petty, but i've accepted that about myself. i'm cool with it.

I know that i'm grateful for The Marsh alot on here, but he's my everything, you know? It's hard not to be grateful for that frequently. so today I'm glad that The Marsh walked into my best friend's kitchen on july 3, 2006. and changed my life. forever.

Thanks for reading!
Lana

Chalazion.

Have you ever heard of a chalazion?

no?

I hadn't either. but apparently The Marsh went and decided he needed to grow two of them.

so what are they?

they are cysts.

on your eyes.

are you throwing up in your mouth too? cause I know I was. do yourself a favor and DO NOT look them up in google images. it ain't pretty.

I know I know. Gee Alana, isn't this a blog about being grateful? why are you writing about him getting chalazions?

well, it's because today The Marsh had them surgically removed.

So today I am grateful that The Marsh is chalazion free.

without chilazions.

post chilazion.

(hopefully anyway)

and wouldn't that have just been the weirdest opening line to date? yes. it would have. i figured a little background information was needed. and his surgery went very well, so we both extemely grateful for that. The Marsh tends be a bit sqeemish, especially where is eyes are concerned too. so i'm also secretly grateful that he didn't faint on our way out of the eye doctors office. just between you and me it was a little touch and go there for a few minutes. i didn't quite think we were gonna make it.

he seems to be doing much better now. he napped for awhile after we got home from his surgery and was up and about this afternoon. his eye looks really sore, he doesn't seem to be complaining too much about it yet, but he certainly looks like he just got decked in the face. he was also told by his doctor that he may randomly have bloody tears come of out his eye. that's not creepy like a virgin mary statue or anything.
(note to self: be extremely grateful if things don't end up looking like the freaking stigmata in here.)

I very proud of him for going through with the surgery. technically, he really didn't have much choice. but he could have put it off much longer. and whether he'll admit it openly or not, i knew he was scared by the prospect of having surgery done around his eye. I love him a little bit more for handling it so well.

I'll also be grateful if he was really kidding about getting up with me in the morning so that i could do his make up before i left for work. something about covering up his black eye. he's so ridiculous. I don't think my make-up would work for his coloring at all.

Thanks for reading!
Lana